Who Is The Counter Culture Clown?

Greetings,

For lack of a better way to start an “About” section, I’ll go ahead and state the ol’ name unit: Bob. That’s right, my name is Bob. Unfortunately, this sparks some of the dumbest questioning I’ve ever witnessed. So allow me to answer those questions before they come out of your dumb-fuck face.

Yes, it IS short for Robert. And yes, it is my real name.

In person, when I introduce myself as Bob, people will actually ask me if that’s my real name. No, I made it up because it sounds so bad ass. Yeah, in fact, it’s the third most common name among biker gangs! Skull. Crusher. Bob. If I was going to make up a name, don’t you think I’d pick something better, like… ANY OTHER FUCKING NAME EVER?! No, I’d much rather make up a name that makes people think I either sell used cars or work in the insurance industry.

By the way, I do work in the insurance industry. Epic fail on my life. It’s not like I’m an insurance salesman or anything fancy, I work for the supply department. Basically, my job consists of shoving various piles of crap (not literally, but a man can dream) into envelopes and mailing them to people who are far more fuckin’ important than my sorry ass.

I’m old enough to be considered an adult, but not old enough to act the part. In fact, I highly doubt I’ll ever act the part. I rather enjoy blending 13-year old immaturity with 50 year old wisdom. I act both older and younger than I actually am, and it’s confusing as all hell. Even to me!

I currently live with my radical feminist roommate (and I, carrying a penis!?) in a crap-tastical apartment on the outskirts of Minneapolis, Minnesota.  My life is absurdly uneventful. All work and no play, my friends. This blog is my one true source of amusement in everyday life.

I’m also a struggling upstart stand up comic. I say struggling, because I only have four stage appearances under my belt as of the writing of this whole thing. Earlier this year, I was able to make it to the top 25 in the Funniest Person in the Twin Cities competition at ACME Comedy Club in downtown Minneapolis. You can listen to the audio of the first round of the competition here.

Anything interesting come of comedy? I was published in a book, does that count? Of course, it appears to be out of print now, and I’ve never seen it in a bookstore, but it fuckin’ does exist!

Anyway, I suppose I should at least riff about this blog for a second as well. This is my futile attempt at Rant Therapy. I have a tendency to go off on rants about anything and everything that comes to mind. Things I see, things that just randomly appear in my head. It’s a form of release for me, and most people around me usually find it quite amusing. I have an issue with editing myself, so most of my stuff can get quite vulgar. A blend of sarcasm, satire, over-exagerations, and colorful langauge helps spice things up and make it a little more reader friendly.

Hopefully, you can enjoy it a little. Try not to take too much of it seriously, while some of the stuff is indeed my opinion on things, some of it is rather tongue-in-cheek and meant as a jest towards the subject at hand. Questions, comments, always welcome. Granted, I may delete your comments or ignore your questions, they are still always welcome.

Now leave me the fuck alone!

~Bob, the Counter Culture Clown